We only have TODAY

"Go ahead and be the light TODAY, because tomorrow is not guaranteed."

-Sonia Lee (Jayesslee)

No one in this world, however rich or powerful he or she may be, can claim that they have tomorrow in their hands. It doesn't matter who we are, none of us can guarantee that we can live past today. Things just happen & nowadays we see bad things happening so suddenly to people whose time are not supposed to come yet. 

When someone knows when he/she is going to die, everything falls into the perspective of what is most important. The most important thing for me is probably to touch lives for God & make a lasting impact in the world with my presence. If I want to be remembered for anything that I did, I want to be remembered for my ability to love. That's why I want to try my best in being a person who loves the people around me, however bad I am at it. 

Mordecai said to Queen Esther, "For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14). I know that I am destined to impact lives, not only that, I was placed where I am & how I was for such a time as this. If I do not live according to the purpose I was called, then God can raise someone else from another place and I will have just lived a meaningless life. 

So, I will remind myself as many times as possible to be the light TODAY, for I do not know what may happen tomorrow. If we all live this way, for such a time as this, how can we not SHINE for Jesus the way we are meant to? So say what you need to say to your loved one TODAY, approach that lonely person in your class TODAY, and live TODAY like there is no tomorrow! After all, we only have today- one today at a time ;)

Step by step

The past few months since the end of last year had been a crazy one for me. Crazy, in a good way. God has been showing me things I've never expected before this. I saw my own plans for my future totally go out the window, I saw people around me making preparations for their UK studies as I just sit back,waiting to see what's my next step. At the very same time, I saw God's different (and not to mention BIGGER) plans for my future, I saw God's vision for me that surpasses just UK to all around the world, and I'm very humbled to witness the salvation of 10 young boys through an opportunity that God provided for me to share my life in the Klang Boy's Brigade. 


Most of my coursemates are going to UK soon for their 3-months Degree programme in June. I was wrestling with God for about 2 semesters about whether or not I will be going to UK. My plans were to go to UK get it done quick & come back to Malaysia with a Degree in time for my 21st birthday. That was THE PLAN. Well, at least until God challenged me to another route. I decided to obey and see what He has in store for me. 


However by His grace & mercy, I've seen so many open doors & opportunities that are coming up in my life. Opportunities that I can't even imagine! Too many to tell it all here & do it justice, but I may share some of it with you all when some of them goes through a few confirmations. All in all, this year will be a very exciting year for me. Far greater than the plan that I had- going UK to get my Degree.


It's overwhelming to look back on His faithfulness & His blessings over my life. What I really want to do now is to take everything in baby steps & know that He is in control. It may be a bit intimidating when people keep asking what I am doing in life, or whether I've found a job, or why I am not going for my UK Degree when it's only 3 more months. However, I want to move only when God tells me. So that I can walk in His plan, not running off to head my own way. 

"Your word is the lamp unto my feet and the light unto my path." (Psalm 119:105). When you walk in darkness and all you have is a lamp for light, you don't run. Instead you take it step by step where the light shines. Similarly I want to walk in His light, not trying to be rushed or pressured by people around me. His peace will be with me, this He promises. 

The Power of WORDS

Teasing, gossiping, bad-mouthing a person, and any other forms of verbal bullying or abuse. All these things- how can I not understand it perfectly well on how words can be so destructive to a person? Ever since I was young, I've been hurt over & over again for things that people say about me behind my back, and also in front of me. I can still remember how when I was younger (probably 7 or so), my family & I went out for dinner & a very young girl (younger than me at the time) was laughing at me, saying how weird my legs looked & that I needed to be carried around by my mother. My dad comforted me saying words from people like that don't matter. All I needed to know was that he & my mother loved me. Still, deep inside those words hurt me enough for me to remember it till this day. 


Too often throughout my years as a primary & secondary student, there were "friends" who said things behind my back that pierces my heart. Many actually laughed at me & some boldly teased me as "cacat" (disabled) in the class. Looking back, I thank God that He gave me such loving parents so that I wouldn't even contemplate on suicide. But really, it hurts.


Now that I'm 20 and as I looked back on all the things that I've been through, I am ashamed to say that I've hurt many many people with my very own words. I've teased people too, and I've said things that hurt people just as how those "friends" hurt me when I was younger. As I trace back my memories of how I've come to be this person that I see in the mirror everyday, I realized that I wasn't like this all my life. As I was physically incapable of defending myself from the things people say about me, I realized that I was good at defending myself verbally. As I honed this "skill" I had, I realized that it was very easy for me to get revenge by teasing the people that teased me in the first place. 


Over the years it became a habit & before I realized it, sarcasm & hurtful words come very naturally to me. I'm awake now at 5.16 a.m. contemplating on this. I can't sleep knowing the damage that my every words has done to the people around me without me realizing it. And so,I prayed & made a covenant with Him and as I pray, I felt very burdened to write this. I want to speak for God & to share His Good News to everyone in the world. I won't want to just "speak well" & get praises while my very life is a contradiction to what I preach. 


I don't want to only "practice what I preach" but more importantly "preach what I practice". I can't do this without His very own WORD. All this while,the words spoken that hurt the people around me are not His words,but MINE. So I'm asking anyone whom I've heard over the past 2 decades of my existence to forgive me for what I've said & done for I was ignorant. I want to learn to LOVE and be able to say "I LOVE YOU" to everyone I meet, regardless what they have done & their past. 

"The power of one word can destroy a person but the Word of God gives LIFE to whoever who hears it. I must no longer live like the Word of God isn't in my life." - Daniel L.

The LIGHT of the CROSS!

The light from the Cross is not the limelight for any preacher. Jesus didn't die to give us a career, but to SAVE THE LOST!

- Reinhard Bonnke

Stepping from the comfort of college life into the uncertain road that God has called me into, one thing that I am certain of- He called me to share my life with others & to share His great love with the rest of the world. Even as I prepare myself to be a speaker for Him,no other preparation is greater than the seeking of His will & the testing of my heart. 

"Celebrity pastors/speakers/preachers" are quite the "hype" nowadays (just my opinion). Don't get me wrong,it's not a bad thing at all that the people of God are famous. I too pray that I'll be touching millions of lives like that one day. But I do see people getting overexcited over a particular pastor or maybe a very famous preacher, similar to the way many people were so crazy over Planetshakers coming, or when Jayesslee came to Malaysia. 


I'm not trying to question the intentions of the "fans" nor am I planning to say some bad about "celebrity pastors". The matter of fact is, as a pastor/speaker/preacher or anything that requires us to be at the forefront, there's always a fine line between shining the light of the cross that points to Jesus, and shining the limelight on ourselves that points to our capabilities. 


I know that because I believe God called me to speak and share my life with others for Him and as a speaker, there is always some part of me that enjoyed the limelight. Even as I'm writing this or any of my other blog posts, there is always some part of me that wants the number of readers to reach a certain amount or even praises and compliment for my writing. It's something that even experienced pastors/writers like Max Lucado go through. There is nothing wrong with enjoying what God has called us to do, but when we start to enjoy the GLORY that is supposed to be for Him then I guess we just need to check our hearts. 


So, even as I prepare to be a speaker for Him, would you pray with me so that my intentions will be pure, and that God will continue to search my heart & teach me to remember that the LIGHT I've seen is not my limelight,rather a humble light that came to SAVE the lost! It's such an honor to be able to serve God in this way, and I'm NOT gonna allow "the enemy" to try and persuade me that my mistakes makes me unworthy to be used by Him.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me,and lead me in the way everlasting. 

(Psalm 139:23-24)

When the GAME ends...

Everyone likes games when they're young. If you didn't, then I guess I kinda feel sorry for you. HAHA,just joking. I used to love board games. I used to play them all the time with my family. Those were the days...

In a game; whether it's monopoly, scrabble, chess, etc; the point of the game is mostly about who gets the most property, the most points, the upper hand in strategy. I started learning chess in Form 1 & I went for tournaments throughout my secondary school years. One thing that stunned me the most about of my opponents and even myself, was that we were all so absorbed in WINNING; whatever the cost. In a few occasions, I nearly cried just because I lost. What happened when I won? Well, I've won a few medals as well as represented Pahang twice. I've got recognition, glory & pride. I was praised by my school, teachers and friends. 1 month after that, my life was back to normal, as if nothing happened. 

The lesson that I've learned is that WHEN THE GAME ENDS, IT ALL GOES BACK INTO THE BOX. No matter how much pieces I've captured in chess or how many properties I've owned in Monopoly, when the game ends, everything I've won goes back into the box. Of course, I do get some temporary glory & bragging rights; which fades very quickly after that. LIFE in this world is very much like that. EVERYTHING that I've gained in this world; be it MONEY, EDUCATION, ACHIEVEMENTS, or even SOCIAL STATUS; it all fades away after I die. 

Living life in the light of this great TRUTH, changed my perspective of what is TEMPORAL & what is ETERNAL. The salvation of my friends are ETERNAL. So, when I see people, I see eternity ahead of them. That is why the thought of how much they meant to God, made me feel compelled to learn to make everyone in my life matter to me; simply because God LOVES them as much as HE loves ME!! Knowing this, it changed my whole perception of LIFE & what I intend to do with it. I must live my life in the light of ETERNITY.

P.S: Inspired by the Bible study I attend in church, "When the game ENDS, it all goes back in the BOX"- John Ortberg. 

Is There MORE to LIFE Than This??

"Life's too short to be spent on worrying". This statement is very true. Life's too short to be spent worrying everyday about everything. However, I also think that life's too short to be spent NOT KNOWING about ETERNITY. 


We're all born in this world. We eat. We sleep. We study then as we grow up, we'll go into the working world. Some of us get married,grow old, then we'll one day DIE. Is there more to life than this?  We all end up DEAD in the end. Full stop, end of story. Or is it? 


When I start to look of how magnificently this whole universe is made & how marvelous the creation of human beings and the rest of the living creatures here on Earth, I wondered whether there is a MAKER of all these wonderful things. As I searched for the truth, I've concluded that there MUST be a MAKER & a GOD that created all these. This thought came to me NOT when I was a Christian, but when I was a Buddhist (the main reason why I'm no longer a Buddhist now). 


I searched more into this so called "Jesus Christ" at that time & I later on concluded that this is the TRUTH, the WAY & the LIFE (I don't have to explain how I came to that conclusion,at least not now...). The point of all this is when we take time to look at things other than ourselves, and learn to look to the CREATOR of the heaven & earth, we will be able to see that LIFE is much much more than what we are experiencing now in the world. There IS more to LIFE than this!! He has given me ETERNAL LIFE & a REASON for me to live. A reason like none other; that goes beyond this lifetime. 


I can say all I want about how you need Jesus in your lives & how you must believe in Jesus, but that wouldn't make much  a difference. I just ask of you to look at all the things in this world, and ask yourselves"Is there more to life than this?" When you search for God, He will be found by you. The decision is fully yours to make. 


God bless;)

Wall-E!

Can't believe I've only just watched Wall-E for the 1st time yesterday! It was a very cute & thoughtful movie. Wall-E is just too cute with his sensitive gestures of love towards Eve. LOL. Anyways, there was one part of the movie that really caught my attention other than the devastation of human behaviour on the earth & all the sweet scenes between Eve & Wall-E. It was the scene where the Autopilot of the spacecraft tried to stop the captain from going back home, explaining how they would not survive on Earth. What really caught my attention was the captain's reply. He replied, "I don't want to survive. I want to LIVE!!"

That simple phrase struck me. There is much more to life than just surviving. Life is meant to be lived. Even in my Christian walk, I sometimes find myself merely surviving. It should be more than that. It's not just about reading the Bible, going to church, serving in church,etc. I should be LIVING, not just surviving; to have a real & living relationship with God, rather than just doing what a Christian should do. I don't want to survive, I want to LIVE!!

Awww,they're just too sweet. LOL!

One of fav characters from the movie. Just so adorable.Haha^^

I wanna be...

"I wanna be a BILLIONAIRE, so freaking bad..." Well, actually I don't. I would say that compared to most of my friends, I don't have much of a BIG ambition for my future. Most of them have ambitions of being successful & having big cars & houses, but honestly, I can't really imagine myself owning all that. What do I want to be? I wanna be an ENCOURAGEMENT. "What? You wanna encourage people for a living? What kind of ambition is that? How do you even plan to survive?", some people would say.

Well, surprisingly for a person who says "I know what God's will in my life is.", I honestly don't know what I would be working as in the future. One thing I do know, it's that I want to be an ENCOURAGEMENT to the people around me. To be able to lift people up when that are facing challenges in their live to the point that they think they can't hold on any longer. To testify that God LOVE all of us & that He is the STRENGTH that kept me going throughout the years. To be an instrument of God to make a DIFFERENCE in a person's life.To be there for a person in need. THAT would be my biggest dream.

Well, say all you want but however "small" or unambitious this ambition of mine may sound to you, it is the reason I wake up every morning, CONVINCED that no matter how weak I am, God has COUNTLESS miraculous things He wants to show me using my life. I'm still learning to allow God to work in my life & mould me into a person into that person one day, despite all my imperfections.

I just wanna be a "hand" that reaches out & lifts people up when they are down.

I am "in a relationship".

Log in to your Facebook now & you'll definitely find that someone suddenly went from being "single" to "in a relationship", or the other way around. Facebook grew to become more that just a tool to socialize & interact with friends, but also a tool to announce our "love" to another; ONLINE.

I used to find romantic relationships a very important aspect of my life & I used to often worry that I wouldn't be able to find a partner in the future. I find this true to many of my friends as well when I see how much their lives revolve around their romantic relationships. I've seen so many of them even going into depression because of relationship problems with their girlfriends/ boyfriends.

It is until after I have a real relationship with God that I slowly find romantic relationships growing dim in comparison to the relationship I have with Him. I am in no way saying that romantic relationships are unimportant NOR am I have any plans to stay single forever. The point I'm trying to convey is that, why so impatient about it? Many people I know get DEPRESSED seeing couples after couples getting together. My thought is, why are they so worried?

God is a FAITHFUL God & He will grant our prayers, in His time; not ours. In the meanwhile, MAKE THE BEST OUT OF LIFE. This is the opportunity that God us giving all of us to do so much MORE for Him. So, don't be depressed when you see a friend who just went from being "single" to "in a relationship" on Facebook. We have a whole life ahead of us, with lots of things to experience other than just ROMANCE. Besides, I AM already "in a relationship" with God. :P

P/S: This is just a random thought of mine. It is not meant to condemn/criticize/ give any opinion whatsoever towards people who are already in or wants a romantic relationship. I, too DO NOT want to be a monk. LOLZ.

God bless.^^